Shout Out to my sister

Today was a big day for my sister.  She officially has lost 100 pounds.  She started about a year and a half ago, but she's done it.  I can't help but be so proud of her - she has worked hard and been so inspiring to me and what I am trying to do.  She has done everything the right way - through a proper diet and exercise.  She is always there if I have questions and she has always been there to encourage me when I might be going through a struggle.  Also, she's been there when I might have been to hard on myself to tell me that I can go out to dinner and have what I want occasionally.  I credit her with teaching me that it is important to weigh your food, use measuring cups and spoons.  That you have to keep up good habits and that its not going to happen overnight.  She has really helped me to realize that I didn't become where I am overnight so its going to take some time to get where I want to be.  She helps me realize that I need to set smaller goals; ones that are attainable.  Also, she helped me to learn to take it one step at a time, that its hard to do everything perfectly.  Master things slowly.  Then add in other things.  For me it was just getting used to eating less, then it was making my own food and not over eating and next its going to be incorporating more exercising in to my day.

In happier news, I tried on a pair of jeans that I previously could fit (but were pretty tight) and they were a tad too loose.  I couldn't wear them all day.  So that's pretty exciting for me!

Soon I will have no clothes

So today I tried on a pair of jeans that were WAYYY too tight for me that I used to be unable to fit.  They are loose.  Not unwearable, but they are a little baggy in the legs and booty.  I am not complaining at all.  The only problem is that they are the jeans I had in reserve to wear as I lost weight.  I didn't expect them to be so loose so soon.  I thought I would be in them for a good month at least.  Now I'm not so sure.  Three weeks I couldn't wear them and now they are loose.  It's crazy.  My old normal jeans are totally unwearable.  Even right after they are washed.  It is just something I didn't expect to see so soon.  Especially without doing really any exercise - only watching what I eat.  So we will see how this continues.

Also, I had chips last night.  Bad idea.  They didn't agree with my tummy.  Another good thing today was I had to go get my parents Hardee's for breakfast.  I had the opportunity to get myself any kind of biscuity-sausagey-eggey goodness but I didn't.  I didn't even want it.  I thought about getting a fountain diet coke, but still I knew I had my trusty Sam's Club Diet Colas in the fridge.  So this has actually been a pretty good day.

Mind over matter

Ok.  Yesterday I had a bit of a breakthrough.  We were out of diet soda and during my meals I like to have a sweet, fizzy drink.  We had full calorie Coke.  It's only 120 cals a can so I figured I could make it work in my day.  I usually have more than that leftover without feeling hungry.  So I had a normal day - but just 240 more calories than normal.  So at night snack time I had about 150 calories in my day (which is 1500).  I was really wanting some Flax Seed Crackers with Laughing Cow Cheese but I knew it would put me like 30 calories or so over.  I didn't think it would be a big deal at all - especially since I typically have a large deficit every day.  I go to make my snack and realize we were out of the Laughing Cow Cheese!  I decided that since that was what I wanted and nothing else really seemed appealing I would just wait until the next day.  So then I relax to watch some TV and then it hit me - I wanted a taco.  However, I really thought about it and realized yea, maybe I didn't.  So I passed.

Total mind over matter.  I wanted it - but I just really thought about it.  Really, I could have had it and it would be okay; but is that what I really want?  I mean it has been 25 days now and I have only had fast food once.  One time.  I'm really happy about that.  Anyways.

Til next time!

I think its official - Fast Food and I broke up

Ok.  So on Saturday night we had a dinner snafu.  So we ended up getting fast food.  I got something smaller than what I used to and it fit in to my calories so I didn't think it was a big deal.  However, I felt so gross after eating it.  It wasn't a "I'm a failure" gross, but more of a "my tummy does not like this" gross.  The meal used to be something that I wouldn't be satisfied with - I'd want more.  Now, that was more than enough.  I felt very, very full.  And then my stomach didn't like the onion rings and I'm pretty sure that it didn't enjoy the burger either.  I'm totally not beating myself up for it either, but I just really have realized it isn't good enough to waste all those calories on.  This is not saying I won't ever have it again - I know there will be times I am in a pinch and it's what is there.  However, its just not good to me.  The food isn't good enough to feel like that.  However, I think Mexican is...  I think my addiction to Mexican food will never die.  To me, this demonstrates that I will make some sacrifices but a burger and fries really isn't one of those any more.  To me, this is huge.  My total weakness used to be fast food.  I could have it anytime, it would be hard to go to get something for someone else with out having something myself.  Now I am pretty confident that I could go pick up something for someone else and just be happy with having something I can find that is just as yummy but better for me at home.

It's amazing what a little time and really listening to your own wants and needs can do!

Counting Calories, Hot Weather, Malaise

So I count calories.  I think it is what is helping me lose weight.  If I start thinking about how many calories I used to eat everyday, I am amazed I hadn't gained more than I already had.  Thinking that I would eat in one meal the same amount of calories I eat in an entire day (sometimes more).  Crazy.  I can't imagine doing that now.  It makes me crazy to think I used to think that eating fast food all the time is okay and just eating because I am bored, or sad, or happy isn't okay.  That there are other things that I can do other than just eat when I'm not hungry.

A second note, it is so hot.  Like today it is literally 100 degrees outside.  I can hardly believe it.  I can't remember the last time it was this hot.  I mean, its been hot before but this is crazy.  I want to start getting out and walking to get some extra exercise.  Luckily, next week its supposed to be in the 80s.  That is a very welcome relief.  I am losing at a pretty good rate - and I'm starting to see a difference so   I think if I add in some extra exercise then I should see a bigger loss.  But also, I would rather just do it to get some time outside and hopefully boost my energy a bit.

Malaise.  The definition is "a vague or unfocused feeling of mental uneasiness, lethargy, or discomfort".  That is what I have been feeling - I can't put my finger on it other than I feel like I lack direction in a bunch of different directions.  It is making me anxious and I just worry about what I am going to do next all the time.  Professionally, I am at a crossroads but I think I will figure it out.  This week my goal is to start really looking for something meaningful.  I have a general idea of what direction I want to go in, but I'm still trying to figure it out.  I feel like things can change.

Clearly, I'm in a funk.  But it hasn't effected my eating habits so I am just going to figure it out.  So yea.  

Stay cool.

Eating enough?

Well, I feel like I am.  However, when I look at how much I am eating I don't think I am.  The big problem is that I feel full.  For instance, all I have had today is an apple, some carrots and dip and an english muffin.  That's it.  I'm full.  Its barely 300 calories but I just don't feel the need to eat.  I ate a big dinner the other night and it made me sick.  It wasn't bad for me - it was just too large.  I had little too much yummy vegetables. So in fact, you CAN get too much of a good thing.  I know they tell you that you need to eat a certain number of calories in order to not to go in to "starvation mode" but I'm not sure how true that is.  My body is still losing weight so I feel like I'm not starving myself by any means.  I just eat things that are lower in calories and enjoy it.  As I have shown, I have also had pizza and went out to mexican but it isn't an every night thing.  So clearly it's not that I have a problem.  I just need to start letting myself eat stuff that is higher in calories (especially during the day).  Maybe I can start getting more creative.  I don't know - maybe I need to have a protein shake or something during the day.  My sister did that for awhile.  I'll have to check on her thoughts on those.  I just hate going to sit down to dinner and knowing that according to my plan I need to eat 1000 calories.  It just is pretty frustrating.  Anyways.  I guess I will see what she thinks I should do.

Hope everyone had an amazing 4th of July!

Eating anything you want - and still losing!

It can be done, friends.  I am pretty much proof.  I have been through a good two weeks again and lost a pretty good deal of weight for that time.  However, I haven't deprived myself at all.  You can't.  It is what I think keeps me going.  I can have anything I want.  In fact, I went out for dinner at a Mexican place on Friday and ate what I wanted.  However, after starting this what I wanted has changed but I would have had anything I wanted regardless and not felt bad.  Why, you ask?  Because I know that I don't do it everyday, that I won't be doing it again soon and that I have eaten the right way all day to allow me to have it.  And the cool thing is, I still lost weight over the period that I had it. One meal will never destroy your progress - unless it is followed by another meal like that and then another.  It's all about moderation and portion control.  I had pizza a couple of Fridays ago, but I fit it in my calories and probably enjoyed it more than I would if I had double what I ate or had just had it a few days before.

I think coming to terms with the fact that you can eat this stuff even if you are making a change is good.  I know that if I had to live my life without ever having pizza again I wouldn't be the happy go lucky person I am.  So go forth, measure and weigh and eat in moderation!